I truly dislike the word FAKE- especially when it is used as an adjective. Even more so when it is an adjective applied to me!
I am an extremely transparent person. I am not one to lie, as a matter of fact, I’m not very good at it! If anything, one of my biggest flaws in this area is that I sometimes do not think about how to temper the truth in love. I screw up in life, I know it and admit it. When I screw up, I take my lumps. Sometimes it is not comfortable - heck, MOST times it’s not comfortable, but I still take them. (The lumps, that is)
And now, because someone who knows me well enough to know that something they heard is not consistent with what they’ve seen and experienced with me……. I’ve been labeled a FAKE. It isn’t because they necessarily see me as a fake. It may be because the person who told them the lies is someone they know also. In this case even longer - and more intimately - than they’ve known me. They reacted unkindly to the lies. They engaged their mouth before engaging their thought process - and not only did they say things, but they put it in writing! It really hurt me - and still does to some extent. That’s why I need to go through this process to “get it”!!
Although this situation hurts, I have been praying that God will bring my heart to forgiveness. I have forgiven the person who did the lying. But that was easy, because they came to me and asked for forgiveness. It’s always easier to forgive someone who asks for it! The one calling me a fake? Well based on past experience [with them], I realize they may not come to ask forgiveness, short of divine intervention. That, however, is not the point.
The point is that I need to forgive them. Period. Because the unforgiving nature in my heart will harden it toward them. Once my heart hardens toward them, I cannot have the type of relationship I am called to have with them. And giving my heart the opportunity to practice hardening is not prudent! I mean, once it sees how easy it is, my heart will want to harden on many other issues also. In the flesh, it is much easier for my heart to harden than to stay soft. And isn’t that what flesh wants - the easiest way out?
If I am going to stand and say I am a follower of Jesus Christ, then I must behave as if I am a follower of Jesus Christ. And His followers are commanded to be forgivers. And we are called to do it to His glory, giving thanks to God!
Colossians 3:12-14,17
Therefore, God’s chosen ones, holy and loved, put on heartfelt compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience, accepting one another and forgiving one another if anyone has a complaint against another. Just as the Lord has forgiven you, so also you must forgive. Above all, put on love–the perfect bond of unity. (17) And whatever you do, in word or in deed, do everything in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him.
Lack of forgiveness on my part can affect my conversations with God (prayer):
Mark 11: 24-26
Therefore, I tell you, all the things you pray and ask for–believe that you have received them, and you will have them. And whenever you stand praying, if you have anything against anyone, forgive him, so that your Father in heaven may also forgive you your wrongdoing. [But if you don't forgive, neither will your Father in heaven forgive your wrongdoing."]
It can affect my spirit - because it becomes MY offense not to forgive. The verses even remind me that not forgiving is an offense:
Luke 17:1-4
He said to His disciples, “Offenses will certainly come, but woe to him through whom they come! It would be better for him if a millstone were hung around his neck and he were thrown into the sea than for him to cause one of these little ones to stumble. Be on your guard. If your brother sins, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him. And if he sins against you seven times in a day, and comes back to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.”
And just in case you find yourself fixed on the fact this speaks of “your brother” and “coming back to you saying, “I repent”":
Matthew 5:43-48
“You have heard that it was said, You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy. But I tell you, love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you, so that you may be sons of your Father in heaven. For He causes His sun to rise on the evil and the good, and sends rain on the righteous and the unrighteous. For if you love those who love you, what reward will you have? Don’t even the tax collectors do the same? And if you greet only your brothers, what are you doing out of the ordinary? Don’t even the Gentiles do the same? Be perfect, therefore, as your heavenly Father is perfect.
The person who has offended me claims believership in Jesus Christ. That makes them a brother. Fruit inspection of this fellow believer may not bear this out, causing them to appear as unsaved. However, I must minister to them as spoken of in Luke 13:6-9 before “cutting them down”. Regardless of the outcome, whether they be brother [in Christ] or [biblical] enemy, I am called to forgive them because of my position in Christ.
Father, You are gracious and merciful. I am called to be as You are. Therefore, because I acknowledge I can do nothing without you, I ask that Your graciousness and mercy be extended through me in this situation. May my heart not harden. May Your love be evidenced in my actions. May I not cause offense to this person, but minister to them in Your love. Father, I ask your discernment in dealing with this person. If I need to rebuke them using Your word, make that evident. If they are truly lost, make that evident so that I may go to them with the milk of the Gospel and minister to their spiritual need of a Savior. Father, draw me so close to You that I do not make a step in this matter - or any matter - without being under Your guidance. May all I do be to Your glory and in Your Son’s name. Amen.
Please pray for my strength of forgiveness to be of the Lord. I thank you for your prayers!
R.
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